Sunday, May 15, 2022

Startling news from Sussex County, England

 (AP) (Reuters)

It seems that the recent meteor shower has given Elton John super powers.

"There was a meteor shower; and, I guess it gave some sort of extradimensional

energy to the local bovine population, " stated Professor Emeritus Eaton Otemiel.

Elton John later on described himself walking out into a field to pet a cow.

"Criminy, " he stated, " I just touched her when she opened her mouth and 

bit me. I could feel my body changing and me growing stronger."

When asked what his super hero name should be, Sir John  stated,

" Well, since you know that Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider to

become Spiderman, then - since it was a radioactive cow  - I should be

called the Dairy Queen."

"I have an inkling, " said Professor Eaton Otemiel, "that he is going to milk

this for all it is worth."

"You had better moooove out of my way when I see you again,"

retorted Sir John.

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